Friday, April 26, 2013

"Pain & Gain" Movie Review

“Pain & Gain” is based on the story of the Sun Gym Gang extortion and murders that took place in Miami, Florida from the fall of 1994 to the spring of 1995. Seems like a pretty dark plot line, right? Of course, but not in this movie.


Michael Bay's “Pain & Gain” is your perfect dark comedy. A lot of laughs mixed in with the perfect amount of grimy shit. By grimy, I mean really grimy. Strippers, coke, robbery, attempted murder, accidental murder all blended up with a lot of moments that will have you laughing your ass off.

The movie is presented in multiple first person narratives much like Martin Scorsese's “Casino” from 1995. Also, like Casino, the movie begins at the end with Daniel Lugo (Mark Wahlberg) introducing himself while speaking about his “do'er” look on life. After a small chase scene with Miami's finest, the story zips back to how all of these events were set in to motion. You later meet Adrian Doorbal (Anthony Mackie) and Paul Doyle (Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson.) Before you know it, they are all torturing Victor Kershaw (Tony Shalhoub) and you are on your way.

Without spoiling to much, the movie delivers way more laughs than dramatic awkwardness and it actually is a fun watch. A little to much fun, really. After a about half an hour you actually start to like these cold blooded, thieving murdering scumbags and I really don't think that is something that you want to be doing. That's another conversation all together, though. I'm just here to tell you if the shit is good or not.

Which it is. It's a funny movie that keeps you entertained the whole way through. The Rock steals the show from Wahlberg with his best comedic performance ever. With the exception of the shitty chase scene, which you surely will notice, it is very entertaining and worth your $10. Here is the trailer just in case you have been living under a rock:

Thursday, April 11, 2013

#FAIL 2

Jarret Jack, were you even trying?  Not sure if serious...




Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Sure seems like @KingJames hates it here in Miami.

LeBron hates it here in Miami so much, he took time to make a special handshake with one of the Miami Heat towel boys. You can clearly tell he is disgusted. Just like, hopefully, you can tell this is sarcasm. Here is the handshake:




Wednesday, April 3, 2013

#FAIL

Way to fail, guy. Aaron Gordon wins the "ASS of the Night" award as he fails miserably in this between the legs dunk in the McDonald's All American game. It was during the actual game, so it is instantly more hilarious. Rejected by the rim, bro? Enjoy getting dogged for weeks.